Let me preface this by stating that I love Scott Pilgrim vs. The World. Edgar Wright had me at the 8-bit intro over the Universal logo. Yes, I am that shallow. Plus, it has Legend of Zelda sound effects throughout the film. That’s like coating a movie in chocolate cheesecake. That being said, the character Scott (Michael Cera) is problematic when viewed from a distance. Hell, he’s a problem when viewed up close. Scott’s an undeniable dick. It never ceases to amaze me throughout this film that a guy we really shouldn’t like is chased by pretty much everyone in the plot. And even though he gets his moment of personal growth, that’s not enough excuse his actions. Shit, it’s not even Scott that’s like this – Ramona is just as bad. It’s enough to make me wonder why in the hell we’d stick with this lot, considering that I’ve stepped in deeper puddles. The answer winds up coming from a surprising source.
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| I love you, yet you’re a complete douche. |
On paper, Scott isn’t impressive; he’s not even impressive in practice, especially in the relationship department. Scott is 22, unemployed, leeching off of his roommate, and dating a 17-year-old Catholic high school student named Knives Chau (Ellen Wong). His relationship with her is fairly shallow, as he describes their activities: “We ride the bus together, we have meaningful conversations about how yearbook club went and about her friends and about, you know, drama… We almost held hands once but then she got embarrassed.” They eat pizza, walk around, go to the library and play video games at the local arcade. Okay, I can’t fault him for that last one, as arcade games are wicked cool, but what I can fault him for is the fact that he makes Knives pay for all of their rounds; at least cough up a few quarters, douche. Point is, theirs is a fairly neutered relationship. The sex part of it is avoided, which is equal parts naivete from Knives and avoidance of a jail term from Scott. Really, all that’s left for him to do with an underage girl is treat the relationship as Wallace describes: “Playtime.” It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what Scott’s really looking for: someone young and inexperienced in order to help ease back into the dating pool after getting crushed by the far more successful Natalie (Brie Larson). Boy is there loaded meaning in there: once her band became successful, Natalie dumped Scott for her bass player, Todd (Brandon Routh, who should be doing WAY more comedy, as he’s funny as shit. No, really – go check out Zack and Miri Make a Porno. How he kept a straight face throughout his scenes with Justin Long is beyond me.). Scott couldn’t handle her rejection or her professional success, and its influence is felt from everything ranging from his hair to his oddball relationship with Knives to his pursuit of Ramona (Mary Elizabeth Winstead). Scott can’t get over being dumped by a woman who is arguably more talented and successful by comparison, so he goes for Knives, who displays only awe around him. He can’t get rejected by her; she’s safe, despite that she’s bland.
It makes sense that Scott cheats on Knives with Ramona because she’s infinitely more interesting by comparsion; however, I’d hesitate to call her the better deal. Ramona, while not 17, isn’t exactly a worldly, mature woman: she’s a delivery messenger for Amazon, she’s biting in all of her interactions with other characters to the point of coming off as a pissy teenager, and she’s still hung up on her ex as well. She doesn’t exactly have her shit figured out: she’s working a job that’s going nowhere while literally running away from her ex to another country. On top of it, the presentation of Ramona is such that she appears so harsh and aloof that it nearly renders her unlikable, and if it wasn’t for her cool hair and theme music (I wish the intro to “Garbage Truck” played when I walked into a room), we’d be telling him, “Seriously, dude, don’t bother.” Ramona makes it clear that she’s not interested in Scott at first when she shoots him down at the party. How does Scott handle this? By stalking her and manufacturing a reason to get to interact with her, which she huffingly accepts. When she agrees to hang out, she acts just as bored, then magically switches gears to spend the night with him. Let me take this chance to congratulate this film on putting together two actors with zero fucking chemistry whatsoever. I’ve seen gay male actors have hotter kisses with women than Michael Cera and Mary Elizabeth Winstead had in this movie. So if there’s no physical chemistry and no personality meshing, why should we want them to be together?
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| The stench of love at first sight is so strong I’m choking. |
It’s puzzling because there’s really no one for which we can cheer, and we wind up liking the most unlikely person of all: wiseass, deadpan drummer Kim (Alison Pill). Kim gives us a reason to stick around because she says all the shit that we want to say. “Scott, if your life had a face, I would punch it,” she tells him within the first five minutes of the film. What’s our reaction? We laugh, because we want to say the same damn thing to Scott. For fuck’s sake, he’s dating a 17-year-old girl that worships him; he’s not a beacon of maturity, and the situation has the potential to head into some really nasty territory, ranging from a broken-hearted girl to a shotgun underage wedding. Kim calls him on that as well: “I mean, are you really happy, or are you really evil?” She’s asking him if he really likes Knives, or if he’s headed down a bad road with this girl sans regard for her feelings. When Scott tries to play the injured party in this interaction, she needles him, insinuating that he lacks the capacity to feel emotional pain while poking at his immaturity. You know what? Scott needs this. After Julie (Aubrey Plaza) lists off bad relationships that he explains away, you know that this isn’t his first time being thoughtless. This is a pattern with him, and he doesn’t think that he needs to change. Kim calls him out on his bullshit, and we identify with her because, like it or not, we all have a Scott in our lives. We all have that one person we want to slap and scream, “GROW THE FUCK UP!” We’ve all got that cousin that refuses to be a dad or that female friend that won’t put leave the party life behind; we resent these people for their refusal to accept adult responsibility, including the pain they cause others by being emotionally stunted. Ramona is doing nothing to help Scott along; in fact, she’s placating him with her own issues. If we can’t yell at Scott ourselves, we may as well stick with the chick that’s going to do the slamming for us.
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| I feel ya, Kim. |
That being said, I still find this film rather funny. It’s got a warped sense of humor, and really, there are some great moments of seeing a guy that’s a tool get thrown through a wall. But at the end of the day, I can’t help but wonder what everyone sees in Scott, from Knives to Ramona to even Kim. He’s a douche, and he’s not going to change. Maybe we should just have coffee with soy milk and call it a day.
Age of consent in Canada is 16
Thank you! Question: does that vary from province to province? Here in the States, it’s all over.