Keeping this one short and sweet this week, because it’s been an exhausting week: Tommy Wiseau trying to do horror! IT’S LIKE FUCKING CHRISTMAS! (A Lammastide gift, mayhaps?)

My computer froze about five seconds into this film. Which means either one of two things:

1 – My computer is really old and I need to think about replacing it.

2 – Even my laptop and internet connection are afraid of Wiseau.

If you’re a learned person, you’ll see that it’s clearly door number two.

It’s worth noting that Wiseau didn’t write or direct this. Those honors go to Brock LaBorde and Jared Richard. The horrible dialogue, the poor props (LOVE the deed to the house that’s just labeled “DEED” in cursive) and terrible special effects are so atrocious that it’s destined for mocking. It’s so bad. I can’t believe someone got this funded. Any time I start to doubt myself, I think, “Well, someone let Tommy Wiseau in front of a camera. Dust yourself off, kid.”

Now that you’ve lost a few dozen brain cells, I’m off. Happy Saturday!